Friday, July 1, 2011

The Psycho Boss!

**Here is a blogpost which has abusive language. There are certain people who may not be comfortable with the abusive language and hence are advised not to read further.

On his B-school farewell day, he was fully sloshed. He went on the stage and halted the DJ from playing the music. He picked up the mike and on a drunken tone he said "main shapath leta hoon ki main kabhi kisi chutiye se order nahi loonga life mein"(I swear that I will never ever take orders from a chutiya)..Rest of the drunkards clapped in unison..But the non drunkards pulled him down back to the dance floor and asked the DJ to continue.

Few days later he joined his first job and was introduced to the most fine looking gentleman as his boss. But all of that fine looks went in bin when the gentleman gave the welcome speech. The boss said "I have picked stones in my life and see where have I reached and I am sure none of u will hesitate picking up the stones for me. We are the best company in India and you are the luckiest person in the world to get a chance to learn from me".

One day in a meeting with big investment bankers, he sat with this laptop in the meeting room. He had deliberately forgotten his notepad which according to his boss was a necessary accessory in the meeting room. But he enjoyed deliberate poking of his boss and seeing all the histrionics of his psycho behavior. And then during the meeting the boss asked him to open his notebook to take some notes. He instead opened the notepad in the windows and seeing that the boss went beserk. He shouted "you retarded chutiya, half gaandu, why did not u bring your notebook. When I was of your age my boss used to hit me with a duster and I think I should do the same with you". Those investment bankers were astonished by the abusive language of the boss. But then the boss had the money and the money is what is important.
During the meeting, while taking notes on the Microsoft notepad, there was an utterance of a name with a title Chidambaram, and in a hurry he typed the spelling wrong and the boss again went beserk " You retarded chutiya, half gaandu, you even don't know the spelling of finance minister of India, this is wat they taught u at an elite B-school"

And then with all courage our victim could muster, he stood up and told the boss "you retarded chutiya, you half gaandu, Mr. P. Chidambaram is not the finance minister anymore he is the home minister and in B-schools, they have better things to teach rather than the spellings of some minister "

Our hero who had once vowed never to take orders from a chutiya was fired then and there only!!

****This is a work of fiction and any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
I felt


Nuktacheen said...

Half-Gandu is a strange thing to say. But, a welcome addition to a small, ever-imaginative lexicon

Nj said...

Want the true story... This is lame when compared to the saga

Vikas Chandra said...

@Nikhil: Like most other words of such a genre, its absurd and funny.

@nJ: For the first time the truth is so much better than the fiction but I am limited to words here and would love to put that in the book I planned.

Nj said...

Eagerly await the masterpiece, and request you not to make it roadies generation - chetan bhagatish kinda novel

nP said...

what is the planned title of the book ? :)

Zlaek said...

*This is a work of fiction and any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

^^ indeed.

Dude. I did an entire project on that...
This abridged, modified version is nothing compared to the hundreds of stories I've heard of him :D