Letter from Noida

Dear friend,

Now that I have reached your city, not specifically your city, but your ugly cousin named Noida, I am sure you would want to read about my experiences here. Well apart from food, friends and winter I have never liked Delhi much but thats ok because I haven't liked any city apart from Bombay. But then it had been too much of Bombay that the nomadic me needed to break free from it.

Here, I don't go out much, I haven't even taken a mobile number here. I don't even like going out here. I tried walking on these roads but I feel lonely. The roads are well built but there are no people but only cars. Thanks to the bundle of books I brought with me that I confine myself to it. I am reading a lot and also playing FIFA on my laptop a lot as well. In my constant attempt to stick to one-touch football, I still lose playing against the laptop.

About my new office, I told you I did not expect much from it. So I would not be able to tell you much about it except that I don't have to wear formals for 6 days any more. You know how much I hated those black shoes and those neatly ironed trousers.

I miss Bombay alot mostly when those auto waalas ask for the fare double the amount I last paid for the same route. I miss Bombay a lot when I feel claustrophobic in Delhi metro with nothing to do footboarding on. I miss khao gali which those bastards so gruesomely bombed. I miss marine drive the most because here after office I have nothing better to do than to return to the same room and go back to reading. Of course I can't go to those malls (which are in plenty here) and sit there and observe people getting a kick out of a 20% rebate on something when the shopkeeper is actually fooling them with a higher price tag.

I am still looking for a new place near my office to rent in. I will prefer living alone this time. I would like to keep my things my way. I will hang that big black and white Gateway of India framed poster on my wall. I will buy some more posters and hang it there.

Oh by the way I am reading English August and its real kick ass stuff. Its pampering me to the hilt.

With love,
vC

Droll thing life is- that mysterious arrangement of merciless logic for a futile purpose. The most you can hope from it is some knowledge of yourself – that comes too late – a crop of unextinguishable regrets.

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Oh Bombay, u will be missed..

Oh Bombay, u will be missed. The city which takes everyone and makes them its own..The city where I earned my first bread and butter.

The city where I lost and discovered both at the same time. Where I lost my nonchalance but discovered the beauty of struggle called life. Where I lost my piece of mind at the office but discovered solace at the sea. Where I lost friends to distances but discovered the bliss of solitude. Where I lost my blackberry but discovered the courage to handle the loss again. Where I lost seven umbrellas and discovered the beauty of rains without umbrellas...

Being one of those missing kinds, one who misses and delves in nostalgia every bit of time, Bombay will be the one to be missed all the time. The city for which I had fallen in love at first sight and then perpetually fell deeper and deeper...

I will miss-

~That struggle to board that morning fast local train and then unboarding it even before the train comes to a halt else being pushed back inside...
~Those walks down Colaba, movie at Regal, beer at Mondegar, whisky at Gokul, cakes at Theobroma..
~The daily Marine Drive walk after office,passing through those couples' neck gnawing and face swallowing until the sun went down and judging them as good kissers or bad kissers and finally sitting on those rocks at the end and having a monologue with it..
~That rush to grab that 9PM squash court at Andheri Sports Complex..
~Those perfunctory walks from Mumbai Central to Haji Ali and then listening to those combined music of sea waves and the novice Qawwali and finally giving up to the temptation of the delicious Sitafal Cream or the Anaar juice at Haji Ali Juice Center..
~That scramble to reach Prithvi theater on time but ending up sitting on those stairs (best seats according to me)
~Eating at Crystal and eating at Khao Gali with so many people that eating it seemed like eating in a fair daily..
~That special cutting chai at the BEST canteen, that yummy butter pao bhaaji at Khao Gali, that delightful keema pao at Mondegar, and that omnipresent vada-pao.


And then so many eventful days happened during my stay at Bombay:
~I got my shirt torn while boarding the local at Andheri and had to rush to Peter England show room to buy another one to office.
~The famous dance on the streets of Bombay the very day India won the world cup.
~The day I tendered my first resignation and felt that whip of freedom.
~I turned 25 and 26 both in Bombay only to realise that you get older faster than you get wiser..

Anyways, there is so much more I cud write to it. I know its more of me and my love for this city in this post and many of you have already made me feel miserable about leaving Bombay.

Good bye Bombay, you will surely be missed!

I read this somewhere...
"mil hi jaayegi manzil humein bhatak kar hi sahi,
gumraah toh woh hai jo ghar se nikle hi nahi..."

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The Psycho Boss!

**Here is a blogpost which has abusive language. There are certain people who may not be comfortable with the abusive language and hence are advised not to read further.


On his B-school farewell day, he was fully sloshed. He went on the stage and halted the DJ from playing the music. He picked up the mike and on a drunken tone he said "main shapath leta hoon ki main kabhi kisi chutiye se order nahi loonga life mein"(I swear that I will never ever take orders from a chutiya)..Rest of the drunkards clapped in unison..But the non drunkards pulled him down back to the dance floor and asked the DJ to continue.

Few days later he joined his first job and was introduced to the most fine looking gentleman as his boss. But all of that fine looks went in bin when the gentleman gave the welcome speech. The boss said "I have picked stones in my life and see where have I reached and I am sure none of u will hesitate picking up the stones for me. We are the best company in India and you are the luckiest person in the world to get a chance to learn from me".

One day in a meeting with big investment bankers, he sat with this laptop in the meeting room. He had deliberately forgotten his notepad which according to his boss was a necessary accessory in the meeting room. But he enjoyed deliberate poking of his boss and seeing all the histrionics of his psycho behavior. And then during the meeting the boss asked him to open his notebook to take some notes. He instead opened the notepad in the windows and seeing that the boss went beserk. He shouted "you retarded chutiya, half gaandu, why did not u bring your notebook. When I was of your age my boss used to hit me with a duster and I think I should do the same with you". Those investment bankers were astonished by the abusive language of the boss. But then the boss had the money and the money is what is important.
During the meeting, while taking notes on the Microsoft notepad, there was an utterance of a name with a title Chidambaram, and in a hurry he typed the spelling wrong and the boss again went beserk " You retarded chutiya, half gaandu, you even don't know the spelling of finance minister of India, this is wat they taught u at an elite B-school"

And then with all courage our victim could muster, he stood up and told the boss "you retarded chutiya, you half gaandu, Mr. P. Chidambaram is not the finance minister anymore he is the home minister and in B-schools, they have better things to teach rather than the spellings of some minister "

Our hero who had once vowed never to take orders from a chutiya was fired then and there only!!

****This is a work of fiction and any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

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